Friday, June 25, 2010

14 of the stupidest things ever said in sales meetings

VentureBeat was kind enough to publish this first.

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Saying the wrong thing can totally screw up a pitch. And sometimes even the best salesman find something utterly moronic coming out of his or her mouth. Trust me, I’ve heard plenty.
I asked a wide number of buyers and sellers about the stupidest things they’ve heard in meetings. Here are the top 14 (I’ve deleted the names to protect the guilty). Heard something as stupid – or worse? Sound off in the comments below.

1. From a Seller: “We flew to a client, and the head of the department came to the lobby to tell us that our key contact died during the night. And my boss said, ‘Well, who’s her replacement? We flew up here and expect to present to someone.”

2. From a Seller: “I fell asleep. While the client was talking. They had to poke me to rouse me.”

3. From a Buyer: “I was working for Dr. Pepper. A vendor catered lunch at headquarters. With Coke products.”

4. From a Seller: “A seller said, ‘What’s your title? We usually present to someone higher up than you.”

5. From a Buyer: “I always make a point to say hello when vendors visited my team. One day, I did my drive by hello, and when I left the room the rep said, “Your boss is smokin’. Is she single?”

6. From a Buyer: “Spelling my name wrong on slide one. It’s Smith.”

7. From a Buyer: “We had a salesman that visited monthly and told me stories of his drunken escapades. After six months, I told him I’m Mormon and didn’t care for it. So he apologized, and then joked ‘So, how many wives you got?’”

8. From a Seller: “How many times do people have to see it in sitcoms before they stop saying ‘when is your baby due?’ to an obese woman.”

9. From a Buyer:
“Our consumers are predominantly Latino – as am I and some of my team. A couple years ago an ingredient supplier came in and referred to all Hispanics as Mexicans, and called our language Mexican. Throughout the meeting, we looked at each other thinking, ‘Did he really say that? There! He did it again!’ We still joke about it. And we don’t work with them anymore.”

10. From a Seller: “Our rep resigned while presenting. Just stopped and said, ‘I don’t really think I want to be in this business.’ Picked up her bag, and left.”

11. From a Buyer: The salesperson hadn’t even handed me the proposal and said he’d give 25 percent less than the quote because they had a rough quarter. Like, ‘here are the fish in the barrel, and here is your shotgun.’”

12. From a Buyer: “The all male ad agency team telling my female marketing team that they understood tampons better than us.”

13. From a Buyer: “People have certain stereotypes of Southerners. Once a rep said, ‘When I hear your accent, I start deducting IQ points.’”

Hopefully you got a chuckle from those. But I’ve saved the best for last. Not because it’s funny, but rather because of how often it happens:

From Everyone: “The rep comes, does their pitch, and doesn’t have next steps. We all file out with no progress and no deal.”

What's NEW in Social

Much love for iMedia Connection for printin' this puppy first.

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If you said "social media" to a marketer 18 months ago, chances are they'd have thought exclusively of social networks. No more. We're seeing social capabilities incorporated into virtually every digital experience. This has brought opportunities and dilemmas for marketers. I say dilemmas because lots of brands got online by pounding to fit a broadcast-shaped peg into an interactive-shaped hole. They developed one-way websites, banners, and search programs. Social media analytics tools are showing us that this model had many flaws.

But as more and more brands embrace social for the two-way offering it is, it's important that we keep abreast of major news in the segment.

This post is designed to give marketers some highlights of what new initiatives, offerings, and companies appear to have traction. It's not for the social "expert." Rather it's geared to the generalist who wants a survey of some of the more important and interesting developments.

Without further ado, check out this summary of social developments divided into four "buckets":

Facebook Open Graph and the socializing of content sites

Facebook's new Open Graph (OG) initiative is a means of adding value for its members across the web while simultaneously enabling content publishers to offer social features. In OG's launch week, more than 50,000 sites incorporated OG components. Many of those implementations were small, such as adding a "like" button embedded in content. But here are some of the ways it's being used on a grander scale:

Pandora is leveraging Open Graph to facilitate the sharing of music and discoveries between friends. Capabilities include:

•See a list of friends who use Pandora
•See which artists and songs are "liked" by friends
•Import Facebook pic into your Pandora profile
•Listen to friends' stations
•Get music suggestions based upon music you "liked"
The Huffington Post has socialized its content by offering a "Hot on Facebook" module, a "what your friends are reading" module, and a "like" button on most stories.

Newspaper sites are incorporating a sort of "your news" box that lists the latest "news" you have received on Facebook. Yes, Facebook's hit some roadblocks and hurdles over privacy. Assuming it gets past those, Open Graph will make profound changes in how we consume content.

Promoted Tweets debut

The big news on Twitter is Promoted Tweets. These are sponsored tweets that appear in the Twitter Search results.

Twitter announced Sponsored Tweets and its charter sponsor list (Best Buy, Bravo, Red Bull, Sony Pictures, Starbucks, and Virgin America) in April. More recently, Twitter altered its terms of service to ban the Twitter platforms and third parties from embedding sponsored tweets into users' tweet streams. Twitter shared this rationale:

First, third party ad networks are not necessarily looking to preserve the unique user experience Twitter has created. They may optimize for either market share or short-term revenue at the expense of the long-term health of the Twitter platform. For example, a third party ad network may seek to maximize ad impressions and click through rates even if it leads to a net decrease in Twitter use due to user dissatisfaction. Secondly, the basis for building a lasting advertising network that benefits users should be innovation, not near-term monetization.
UnFacebooks and user control

Partly as a response to concerns about Facebook's privacy missteps, a number of alternative social networks are attracting attention. From tech blogs to Elle.com, the UnFacebooks are a popular story. Of course Orkut, MySpace, and Friendster are also trying to capitalize on Facebook's stumbles. But here are some new sites getting play:

Diaspora: Billing itself as "an open source personal web service that will put individuals in control of their data," Diaspora is the brainchild of four NYU students and has raised more than 20 times its initial funding goal. The idea behind Diaspora is essentially opt-in, versus the major social sites' opt-out approach. It is working feverishly to get everything going this summer.

Pip.io lets users define different "rooms" of people that they want to share information with. Users can also define if they want one- or two-way communications with their rooms.

A self-described "social operating system," Pip.io is clearly trying to be more than a social net. When you visit, make sure you are using Firefox or Chrome, not MSIE.

Story of My Life is a new platform enabling members to tell stories in a variety of media and make them private or public. I love the idea of letting more people tell the stories of their lives. And not just in words.

Does it sound like a blog platform to you? Yes, but the community features make it more than that. And it's really more about defined stories than a stream of consciousness.

Social search

The biggest proportion of online dollars goes to search, so let's take a look at some of the "new" social search offerings:

Mahalo bills itself as a human-powered search engine that combines machine results with expert and consumer recommendations. From its beginnings as a search-focused entity, it has now added a lively Mahalo Answers section and Mahalo How To, where experts help users accomplish tasks.

Wowd (disclosure: a Catalyst:SF client) helps users understand what content is popular now and what content users like best. Users download the application, and conduct searches that reveal:

•The most popular pages related to the search query
•The freshest content available on a topic, whether just created or just viewed by other Wowd users
•Real-time content from most sites, not just a select few
•Pages that other users have rated as most valuable
Wowd is for people who are interested in the latest information on a topic -- in the things that are happening now and the content that has just been created or updated.

By combining a sophisticated search algorithm with consumer behavior and ratings, it provides a unique perspective.

Delver is a social shopping community that helps people find the best products and make the best buying choices with the help of friends, family, and the community at large. The idea behind this offering is to create a community around shopping and help people learn from each other about interesting products and the best places to buy them.

The bigness of this concept is that the site is out to make online shopping fun, rather than a utilitarian experience.

The portals (and Meebo)

The social strategies of the major portals are very different from one another. At one end of the spectrum, Yahoo is leveraging social content from its own sources as well as third parties like Facebook. Apparently, Yahoo has concluded that trying to create a new social media entity won't work. Instead it blends the information available from existing platforms to enrich Yahoo channels.

On the other end of the spectrum, Google is still trying to create a homegrown social platform to help it become a leader in providing social content. One of the more interesting integrations is its flavor of social search. By linking your Google profile to social platforms, you get search results that include comments and content from connections.

Google Buzz is a social sharing service integrated into Gmail that lets you share statuses, text, photos, and videos easily. Public and private sharing are offered.

Google Wave is a collaboration platform that creates a shared space for teams. Participants can add text, photos, and videos in real time. The vision for Wave is to replace a variety of other applications with a single environment.

Microsoft's strategy sits between these two poles, though it's closer to Yahoo's. Bing is leveraging existing third-party communities to socialize search results. Now tweets, blog posts, and shared links are incorporated in results.

But Bing is also striving to create unique social-centered experiences. One example is how it integrated social into Bing Shopping. According to its blog, "With a single click you can ask for advice from your friends on Facebook and followers on Twitter for their take on a product you saw on Bing Shopping."

Meebo's strategy is to focus on its strength in instantaneous sharing to carve out social territory. Its new "Meebo Bar" offers publishers an easy way to socialize content and promote virality. This ad-supported bar appears when a Meebo user visits a bar-enabled site. Users can send pages and content via IM of course, but also through email, Facebook, Twitter, Google Buzz, and Yahoo.

Conclusion

Sharing content and opinions is something consumers seem to want in many of their web experiences, not just on specific social sites. How some of these companies and platforms will work with marketers, or indeed if they will work with marketers, remains to be seen. But consumers show a marked unwillingness to pay for content, so my guess is that many of these companies will be a-knockin' on our doors before long. That doesn't mean that they will work with us using the classic advertising model, though.

I would be remiss not to mention blogs as the "sleeper" of social. It seems that these high-quality, high-passion, high-depth environments often get overlooked by marketers. While social nets and Twitter can offer us enormous reach, so can blogs, many of which offer the added benefit of expert perspective and depth of content. They may not be the shiniest of the social objects, but in my view brands would do well to spend more time and attention on them.

An article like this omits other good companies and developments. If you are working on something that is more real than vapor and want me to talk about it as a follow-up, send me an email. If I like it, I will be happy to follow up with a brief piece about you.

Getting Past The No-s

The fine people at VentureBeat were kind enough to publish this first.

Buyers are generally not too keen on changing what they are doing. While a few are geared toward innovative solutions, most veer toward the tried and true. (Actually, most have an inclination to stick with exactly what they have now.) For entrepreneurs, one of the biggest challenges is shaking the complacency out of their prospects.

Whether they realize it or not, prospects tend to ask a few loaded questions to eliminate a new offering from consideration. Answer ‘em wrong and you’ll give the prospect a reason to say no immediately. Here are four of the most common, and some thoughts on ways around them.

How much? This is every buyer’s favorite. If you simply state a typical price directly, they can say “that’s more than I have” regardless of the amount. If you refuse to give a price, they assume its high and shut down. Instead, try stating your price in the context of competitor pricing – or in terms of how many months it takes to pay back.

Why would I want to switch from brand X? The “I’m happy with brand X” excuse is a bit tough to navigate. The best salespeople are really good at asking about least favorite aspects of brand X, and touting their superiority on those dimensions. “Well, brand X is a good product. Have you had any challenges or pain points with it?”

This gives you an invaluable look into how you might be able to provide a better solution. Recognizing the quality of competitor items can underscore your honesty and industry understanding. Now, they may say “No problems.” But a good follow is: ”Really? Some other companies have told me…” If you get another no, it’s probably best to move on.

Have you worked my competitors? Many companies are followers, preferring to deal with service providers that already understand their categories. If you have worked with competitors, name drop. If not, it’s tougher.

The best answer anyone has ever given me was “We don’t pretend to understand your industry as well as you do. But our team is set up to leverage your knowledge and desires into the service.” Notice how that answer says no in a flattering/collaborative way – which speaks well to how they would be to work with.

In any circumstance, do not lie. Most industries are too small a world to get away with it.

How long does it take to get running? Whether it’s software or a metal stamper, there’s usually some run-in time before a product or service is delivering full value. For complex systems or equipment, it often works to give two times, a time-to-first-use and a time-to-100 percent.

This reduces the psychological window and makes it harder to reject an option out of hand. It’s best to be sunny in your estimates (you hopefully are anyway,) but not so optimistic that 99 percent of users will be disappointed.

I should add a disclaimer that I’m no selling genius. These thoughts come from someone on the buying side. But as great sellers know, most of us actually want to be sold something better. We say no out of busyness or fear of the unknown.

But there are few among us who don’t have a need for better partners. To become one, you need to get us past our inertia and into imagining what things could be like.

H1 2010 - Half Year in Review!

Special thanks to my BFFs at iMedia Connection for publishing this there first!

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What a difference a year makes. Twelve months ago was a wholly different kettle of fish for most of us -- a kettle that had been left out to fester in the sun. But the optimism is back, baby! We saw it in the packed conference and expo aisles at ad:tech San Francisco in April, and in the double-digit growth figures for ad revenue in the first quarter of the year. I think this pic sums up the spirit well:



The can-do mood has returned. Memories of 2009 have been thrown into the ash heap of history. The digibiz again smells as sweet as gardenias in springtime.

But let's leave odor to the side for a bit. There's been more to the first half of 2010 than just better business results. Here are some of the most important happenings this year:

Jobs well done

Not since Moses and the 10 Commandments have a man and a tablet so captured world attention.





Being a dyed-in-the-wool "PC," I confess I didn't expect the iPad to make an impact this quick. I figured iPad 2 or iPad 3 would be "the one." But then I went to the April Ad Age Digital Conference. When I saw the audience bathed in the eerie blue glow of dozens of iPad screens during the less-scintillating sessions, it was clear that Apple had redefined human existence again.

It's been said that the magazine and newspaper industries have the most to gain from iPad success. Whether or not it restores the luster to paginated content, I'm sure the bazillion Amazon Kindle print ads are providing a nice shot in the arm.



Alas, I am a PC. Before I can suckle at the device convergence teat, I will have to wait until a less attractive, crash-prone, heavier tablet is launched. But the little x to close a window will be on the right instead of the left, and that's the main thing.

You are watching the DSP network

DSPs are certainly making an impact this year. People say it's about getting a better price, but I am certain it's more about value. Too many networks offer me-too technology, take too long to respond to requests, and aren't bringing ideas to their clients. Those that focus on being partners instead of talking about being partners are doing just fine. I can't imagine many people are sad to see a little consolidation; I mean, do we really need 11 iPhone app ad networks?

The shakeout might help some players wake up to the fact that that virtually all of them say exactly the same things:

•Reach of 100-and-fill-in-the-blank million
•18,972 high-quality sites (plus access to 380,000,000 more high-quality sites through the exchanges)
•Full transparency asterisk

In short, I think DSPs are going to force the good networks to be better, and the weak ones to toughen up or disappear.

The year of mobile

Is it just me, or is it starting to feel like this is the year? Real brands are spending real money and getting real reach. Yay! And that's only part of the good news: We've also witnessed the arrival of a workaround to Apple's App Approval Church Lady.

It's Zip, the revolutionary advance in personal software that lets you unzip your iPhone's virtual apparel. With Zip, the user uploads the reveal photo -- sort of a "just add Satan" solution.



On a slightly more serious note, have you noticed that Apple has become exactly what it purported to shatter in 1984? The brand:

•Controls all the outlets
•Holds a virtual monopoly on music devices
•Defines what is and isn't acceptable to buy
•Requires that everything be purchased through it
Will Apple soon declare iWar on Oceania in a glorious alliance with Eastasia? Oh, I make fun of the brand, but it is miles ahead of the competition when it comes to making cool stuff.

The best news for all of us is that after only -- what was it? 100 years? -- other companies are finally making smartphones that almost rival Apple's iPhone. Android phone sales are taking off, which is good news whether or not you worship at the Apple altar. A horse race will make all the devices better over time.

I guess I'd buy it, if I had a coupon

Ah, the focus group attendee's favorite adage. And boy oh Boyardee do Chris and Carol Consumer have lots of opportunities to get coupons these days.

Online distribution has exploded. Coupons.com, the big papa of the printable coupon business, distributed more than $1 billion in savings in 2009. Holy Toledo! It's now a top 50 web property, and it's enough to make everyone really excited about savings.

Of course, it's not just PC-delivered coupons that are rockin'. Mobile couponing trends are skyrocketing as well -- with place-based mobile platforms poised to remake brick and mortar retailing.

Privacy, please

Everyone's least-favorite topic has definitely come to the fore in the past several months.



The good news is that a group of trade associations that resembles alphabet soup (AAAA, IAB, BBB, DMA, ANA) has put forth a self-regulatory solution that appears to be right on.

The Power i is a notification system that lets consumers click an icon, read about the data collection, and choose whether or not to continue receiving BT messages. It's time for real choices and real information sharing with consumers.

But not all is as sweet as fresh-cut hay in Privacyland. Consumer ire with Facebook, Google, and others is on the rise.

My introduction to the export of Facebook data to outside publishers came on The Huffington Post, when I suddenly started seeing my friends' photos along with reports that they had read certain stories on the site.

It was momentarily intriguing. But then I got to thinking, "if I can see their reading choices, then they can see mine."

Gentle reader, I take no issue with folks knowing I've read a thoughtful analysis of immigration policy. But my penchant for the HuffPost's photo collections of celebrity cellulite, unintentionally pornographic toys, and botched Botox? That's another matter entirely.

I don't know whom to be angrier with, Mark Zuckerberg or Arianna Huffington. How dare they! Butt on to less weighty matters.



Good Lord, we as an industry have to be less ham-fisted about changes to privacy policies. Must every revision be followed by two weeks of apologies? And must every revision effectively jettison the entire concept of having a private life?

Out-of-home gets some love

Ah, digital out-of-home. I am often accused of giving short shrift to DOOH when I write on these pages. These accusations come in angry emails sent through iMedia's People Connection. Let's turn those OOH industry frowns upside down, shall we? And at the same time, take the opportunity to point out the rather impressive growth trends in the sector. A great white paper from the fine people at Adcentricity offers the following stats and projections for digital OOH:



A huge portion of this segment is in captive venues, making programs in the channel powerful inducements to purchase. In the first half of 2010, more and more retailers realized the revenue potential from allowing such media outlets in their stores.

There, OOH people. I expect all those who have ever attacked me to send me a lovely thank you note. And make sure you keep doing what you're doing, because you seem to be making all the right moves.

No one on the corner got badges like us

Onward to social gaming. From Foursquare to FarmVille to Mafia Wars, the social gaming sphere has become one hot commodity.

Add buying virtual goods with real money, and you get a tremendously successful business. Great game design and virtual goods are turning into a tasty recipe for consumer obsession. Just look at this fawning rap video dedicated to Foursquare:



Best of all, there are virtual games to suit virtually any taste and interest. The research firm Inside Network is projecting more than $800 million in sales of virtual goods this year.

Smarter, savvier, better

So there it is, dear reader -- a rundown of the first half of the year. Predictably deep, profoundly satisfying, gardenia scented.

This is a time of optimism, new devices, new technologies, and lots of discounts. As varied and fascinating as, well, every other six-month period in this magnificently crazy industry.

Each year I am struck by the intelligence and ingenuity of the people who populate digital marketing. They (you) are why I really do treasure working in this business. In all seriousness, I don't think a more clever and creative and entertaining bunch of people has ever been assembled. Well, maybe in Renaissance Florence. But other than that, you are a really wonderful group of friends, coworkers, and competitors, and for each of you I feel truly grateful.

And it is this ragtag fugitive fleet of individuals who has made 2010 such a dynamic, exciting, occasionally hilarious epoch. Now take my advice and go found a Foursquare-based ad network. Might I suggest the name BenderBillionz? Just imagine the PowerPoint template: "Mayorz by the millionz, profitz by the billionz."