Saturday, November 29, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Yeah, But Christmas Isn't Actually About...Christ...Is It?
White House Happy Hanukah cards bear a Christmas tree.
A fitting end to a confused Presidency.
When reached for comment, Laura Bush's spokeswoman, Sally McDonough, said the White House usually prints separate cards, but in the waning days of the presidency, there had been an oversight.
"Mrs. Bush is apologetic," she said. "It is something that just slipped through the cracks."
Mess-A-yah Mess-I-yah, potato potahto, same diff...
What the heck do you Jews want, respect for your beliefs?
Not from dis Prezdent.
A fitting end to a confused Presidency.
When reached for comment, Laura Bush's spokeswoman, Sally McDonough, said the White House usually prints separate cards, but in the waning days of the presidency, there had been an oversight.
"Mrs. Bush is apologetic," she said. "It is something that just slipped through the cracks."
Mess-A-yah Mess-I-yah, potato potahto, same diff...
What the heck do you Jews want, respect for your beliefs?
Not from dis Prezdent.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
How AIG Is Wasting -- Oh I Mean Spending -- $150B of Our Money
Email Exchange Between the PR Team At AIG and Wonkette, America's funniest political blog. Wonkette, please forgive me for reposting your post, but it is too funny not to have spring up across the web in 10,000 places.
AIG Using Taxpayers’ $150 Billion To Annoy Comedy Blog
The government rescued insurance giant AIG from its own wretched, greedy incompetence by giving the evil company $80 billion $150 billion of your tax dollars. With this insane reward for being an epic failure, AIG was supposed to rebuild its core business — which is insurance, not gambling like a drunken fool and destroying the entire global economy in the process. Instead, AIG is burning through its bailout cash by sending absurd emails to political-comedy blogs demanding clarification on whether the $125 million of taxpayer dollars AIG is spending on English football sponsorships is simply a continuing waste of taxpayer millions or a renewed waste of taxpayer millions.
This is the first of three (3) emails your Wonkette editor received this morning from AIG Media Relations in New York:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 9:49 AM
Subject: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
You report that AIG is renewing its Manchester United sponsorship. That is not true. We are not renewing our sponsorship with Manchester United, we are in active discussions regarding our pre-existing contract, and in the interim we are eliminating related costs such as marketing, advertising and hospitality.
The story, which was sourced from a story by ABC News, reported that AIG “has no plans to cancel hundreds of millions of dollars in sports team sponsorships.” That is simply inaccurate. AIG has canceled a number of sponsorships around the world. AIG has not renewed long-term sponsorship relationships with marquee names like the New York Yankees, New York Knicks, Houston Rockets, Houston Astros, Madison Square Garden, AIG Japan Open (Tennis), Irish Champion Hurdle (Horseracing), and New Orleans Jazz Fest.
AIG has only a handful of multi-year sponsorship contracts in effect. The company has had discussions with those organizations that we do not intend to renew those contracts when they expire. Regardless of the contractual situation, we are eliminating all costs associated with marketing, advertising and hospitality.
Please don’t hesitate to e-mail or call me if you want some additional clarity.
_____ _______
AIG Media Relations
______ _____ ____
New York, NY 10270
_____.______@aig.com
Your editor skimmed this weird e-mail, laughed at this outrageous attempt at massaging the image of a company whose initials literally stand for “American Inept Greed,” and decided to at least forward it to your associate editors, for laffs, with this note:
Ken Layne to Sara, Jim
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:07 PM
subject Fwd: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
These are the people who destroyed the global economy. It’s less surprising when you see how stupid they are, isn’t it?
- Show quoted text -
Your editor was finished thinking about the AIG email, but AIG was not finished thinking about your Wonkette! In fact, a new AIG email arrived while your editor was forwarding the first one to his colleagues:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:06 PM
Subject: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
If you are actively covering AIG, we’d like to be engaged with Wonkette to allow your readers to get answers about AIG directly from the company.
I’d like you to note that today, AIG announced some voluntary compensation restrictions that go beyond the requirements specified by TARP. AIG will have voluntary restrictions on executive compensation that include a $1 salary for its Chief Executive Officer; no 2008 annual bonuses and no salary increases through 2009 for AIG’s top-seven-officer Leadership Group; and no salary increases through 2009 for the 50 next-highest executives, in addition to other bonus, severance and retention award restrictions. AIG is also developing a funding structure to ensure that no taxpayer dollars are used for annual bonus or future cash performance awards for AIG’s “Senior Partners,” the top 60 members of management.
The details are laid out in a press release that we issued this morning (http://ir.aigcorporate.com/phoenix.zhtml?c=76115&p=irol-newsArticle&ID=1230022&highlight=).
Let me know if you are interested in engaging. If so, we can establish some rules that are amenable for both of us.
Thank you.
_____ _______
AIG Media Relations
______ _____ ____
New York, NY 10270
_____.______@aig.com
Your editor was now officially annoyed — “establish some rules that are amenable for both of us”?! — and banged out the following reply:
From: ken@wonkette.com
To: _____._____@aig.com
Cc: “Sara K. Smith” “Jim Newell”
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:22 PM
subject Re: And while you are covering AIG…
mailed-by gmail.com
Dude, Wonkette is a political comedy blog. You live in New York, you work in “media relations,” and you don’t know Wonkette or Gawker or anything? Jesus fucking christ. This is how you clowns are spending EIGHTY BILLION DOLLARS of taxpayer money, whining to comedy blogs? Jesus fucking christ. I am going to post all of these, for hilarity.
The reply arrived moments later:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:06 PM
Subject: RE: And while you are covering AIG…
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
Can you give me a call please.
Nah dude. But we will run the correction you requested! In this post about AIG blowing $125 million of American taxpayers’ money on some limey soccer team, in England, we said AIG would “renew” the spending of $125 million in American taxpayers’ money on a limey soccer team, in England, when AIG says this insane waste of American bailout money is actually just a continuing thing, and not a renewal. Wonkette regrets that AIG got $150 billion in federal bailout money.
AIG Using Taxpayers’ $150 Billion To Annoy Comedy Blog
The government rescued insurance giant AIG from its own wretched, greedy incompetence by giving the evil company $80 billion $150 billion of your tax dollars. With this insane reward for being an epic failure, AIG was supposed to rebuild its core business — which is insurance, not gambling like a drunken fool and destroying the entire global economy in the process. Instead, AIG is burning through its bailout cash by sending absurd emails to political-comedy blogs demanding clarification on whether the $125 million of taxpayer dollars AIG is spending on English football sponsorships is simply a continuing waste of taxpayer millions or a renewed waste of taxpayer millions.
This is the first of three (3) emails your Wonkette editor received this morning from AIG Media Relations in New York:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 9:49 AM
Subject: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
You report that AIG is renewing its Manchester United sponsorship. That is not true. We are not renewing our sponsorship with Manchester United, we are in active discussions regarding our pre-existing contract, and in the interim we are eliminating related costs such as marketing, advertising and hospitality.
The story, which was sourced from a story by ABC News, reported that AIG “has no plans to cancel hundreds of millions of dollars in sports team sponsorships.” That is simply inaccurate. AIG has canceled a number of sponsorships around the world. AIG has not renewed long-term sponsorship relationships with marquee names like the New York Yankees, New York Knicks, Houston Rockets, Houston Astros, Madison Square Garden, AIG Japan Open (Tennis), Irish Champion Hurdle (Horseracing), and New Orleans Jazz Fest.
AIG has only a handful of multi-year sponsorship contracts in effect. The company has had discussions with those organizations that we do not intend to renew those contracts when they expire. Regardless of the contractual situation, we are eliminating all costs associated with marketing, advertising and hospitality.
Please don’t hesitate to e-mail or call me if you want some additional clarity.
_____ _______
AIG Media Relations
______ _____ ____
New York, NY 10270
_____.______@aig.com
Your editor skimmed this weird e-mail, laughed at this outrageous attempt at massaging the image of a company whose initials literally stand for “American Inept Greed,” and decided to at least forward it to your associate editors, for laffs, with this note:
Ken Layne to Sara, Jim
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:07 PM
subject Fwd: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
These are the people who destroyed the global economy. It’s less surprising when you see how stupid they are, isn’t it?
- Show quoted text -
Your editor was finished thinking about the AIG email, but AIG was not finished thinking about your Wonkette! In fact, a new AIG email arrived while your editor was forwarding the first one to his colleagues:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:06 PM
Subject: regarding your post: Your Most Recent ‘AIG Still Spends Absurd Amounts Of Taxpayer Money On Dumb Things’ News!
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
If you are actively covering AIG, we’d like to be engaged with Wonkette to allow your readers to get answers about AIG directly from the company.
I’d like you to note that today, AIG announced some voluntary compensation restrictions that go beyond the requirements specified by TARP. AIG will have voluntary restrictions on executive compensation that include a $1 salary for its Chief Executive Officer; no 2008 annual bonuses and no salary increases through 2009 for AIG’s top-seven-officer Leadership Group; and no salary increases through 2009 for the 50 next-highest executives, in addition to other bonus, severance and retention award restrictions. AIG is also developing a funding structure to ensure that no taxpayer dollars are used for annual bonus or future cash performance awards for AIG’s “Senior Partners,” the top 60 members of management.
The details are laid out in a press release that we issued this morning (http://ir.aigcorporate.com/phoenix.zhtml?c=76115&p=irol-newsArticle&ID=1230022&highlight=).
Let me know if you are interested in engaging. If so, we can establish some rules that are amenable for both of us.
Thank you.
_____ _______
AIG Media Relations
______ _____ ____
New York, NY 10270
_____.______@aig.com
Your editor was now officially annoyed — “establish some rules that are amenable for both of us”?! — and banged out the following reply:
From: ken@wonkette.com
To: _____._____@aig.com
Cc: “Sara K. Smith” “Jim Newell”
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:22 PM
subject Re: And while you are covering AIG…
mailed-by gmail.com
Dude, Wonkette is a political comedy blog. You live in New York, you work in “media relations,” and you don’t know Wonkette or Gawker or anything? Jesus fucking christ. This is how you clowns are spending EIGHTY BILLION DOLLARS of taxpayer money, whining to comedy blogs? Jesus fucking christ. I am going to post all of these, for hilarity.
The reply arrived moments later:
From: ____.____@aig.com
To: ken@wonkette.com
Date: Tue, Nov 25, 2008 at 12:06 PM
Subject: RE: And while you are covering AIG…
mailed-by aig.com
Ken:
Can you give me a call please.
Nah dude. But we will run the correction you requested! In this post about AIG blowing $125 million of American taxpayers’ money on some limey soccer team, in England, we said AIG would “renew” the spending of $125 million in American taxpayers’ money on a limey soccer team, in England, when AIG says this insane waste of American bailout money is actually just a continuing thing, and not a renewal. Wonkette regrets that AIG got $150 billion in federal bailout money.
Vid Still Growing Like Mad
Despite the weaker than expected economy, online video appears to be poised for continued growth. Check out these massive projections from eMarketer:
See people? Not all the news should make you frown.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write.
See people? Not all the news should make you frown.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write.
Buick and Tiger: Cat in The Rear View Mirror
GM and Tiger are parting company for "mutual" reasons, which I am guessing have SOMETHING to do with GM being broke. It's sad that this has to happen -- I think that relationship had a lot of value for Buick, which doesn't have a lot else going for it at the mo'.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write
The Anti-Beta Revolution
Jesus Diaz at Gizmodo has called for a revolution against the beta culture -- the idea that it's OK to release buggy unfinished software and apps so long as you slap a beta star burst on the top of it.
I couldn't agree more. As part of what I do for this blog, I download a variety of things to test onto my PCs -- work and home. And I am getting GD tired of crap that locks up my machine, misfires, offers very little or no documentation, and just plain screws up my mornings.
THEN! You try to delete it and find you have to do it the add or remove programs way instead of clicking on an uninstall icon in your programs list. Then! It makes you restart.
I have been extremely forgiving of new offerings on this and other scores, but suffice it to say those days are soon going to be over. As of 1.1.09 I am going to call a crap a crap if "beta" really means sloppy. That doesn't mean I won't forgive the odd problem, but these pieces of dysfunctional half baked crap help no one, and more or less ensure that I will not use the offerings on an ongoing basis.
Now, there are those cynics out there who will correctly point out that you get what you pay for -- when you download a free app, you shouldn't expect something magical.
That is bullpuckey. If the engineers of the world want to create a culture of free, they need to ensure that free doesn't mean broken.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write.
I couldn't agree more. As part of what I do for this blog, I download a variety of things to test onto my PCs -- work and home. And I am getting GD tired of crap that locks up my machine, misfires, offers very little or no documentation, and just plain screws up my mornings.
THEN! You try to delete it and find you have to do it the add or remove programs way instead of clicking on an uninstall icon in your programs list. Then! It makes you restart.
I have been extremely forgiving of new offerings on this and other scores, but suffice it to say those days are soon going to be over. As of 1.1.09 I am going to call a crap a crap if "beta" really means sloppy. That doesn't mean I won't forgive the odd problem, but these pieces of dysfunctional half baked crap help no one, and more or less ensure that I will not use the offerings on an ongoing basis.
Now, there are those cynics out there who will correctly point out that you get what you pay for -- when you download a free app, you shouldn't expect something magical.
That is bullpuckey. If the engineers of the world want to create a culture of free, they need to ensure that free doesn't mean broken.
Thanks for reading, and don't forget to write.
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